Hi, How Ya Doin :)

Hi, How Ya Doin:)

It’s been a while but I hope you’re doing well. There have been a lot of things happening on my end just the past year; a lot of growth but also some losses.

Throughout this journey of adulthood, I realized that no matter how much you love someone they have the choice to leave your side- and there won’t be anything you can do about it except to accept the way things are and carry on. All you have is yourself.

I’ve been experiencing that a lot with the friendships I made this past year- and let me tell you first Boys are Stupid! Gosh, you really can’t keep a genuine friendship with someone without them getting butt hurt that you don’t want any relationship. I’m not complaining, but ya know #firstworldproblems.

Anyways before I start ranting, my point in coming back onto this blog was to really emphasize the importance of self love. I feel like I tried to implement self love last year but it turned into a mess because apparently boys wanted me to feel guilty about doing my own thing (sorry, promise last time ranting).

Alas, I’m going to recreate 2019 and make it the year to re-establish not only myself, but to help other people really find who they are as an individual – not who they are with their friends, not who they are with their family, not who they are with their significant other.

Who are you?

Are you comfortable looking in the mirror at your stripped down, most vulnerable self?

I’m in the process of writing a book about the definition of love, and it’s not the facade that media has painted and has made us fixated on a very superficial meaning of love. If you’re interested (my small amount of followers that I love so much LOL), please message me to be part of the book – it’ll be just a couple interview questions that I think are important to discuss.

Well good night – I’m signing off and hopefully I’ll be back on again soon with another life update 🙂

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Words Left Unsaid

It’s never easy to be over a break-up so easily, because things would never be the same. You see this person in a different light and it’s as if you don’t know this person anymore. When you see him walk by and your heart tells you to go after him and ask a simple question such as “how are you doing?” but you know that it’s against what your pride and dignity tells you, so you just pretend to not see him.  It’s hard to get used to life without someone you’ve been with for so long; it may seem as if something is missing from your life. You tell yourself that you won’t let the breakup go to your head, that  you won’t make it such a big deal and that you can get over it, but people overestimate themselves.

Colbie Caillat’s song “I Never Told You” talks about all of the things that are left unsaid before a break-up. Things always get bottled up inside our thoughts and we never have the audacity to say them because we’re scared. We’re not really sure why we’re scared either, but sometimes when we actually want to say what we’re feeling and how much we love that person, it’s too late. They have left your grasp and you can’t hold onto them like you used to anymore. Then you start to realize all of the little things you loved about that person. Like seeing them every morning when they wake up next to you, seeing their smile and seeing their eyes looking at you with their most delicate gaze. This song is so beautiful and Colbie Caillat is gorgeous as well, so I really like this song.

This song makes me look back and imagine myself with my relationship. What if I had to do it all over again? What if that day, he didn’t decide to break up with me? When we broke up I thought to myself that I’ll miss seeing his smile the most, and it hurt to know that if he did smile it wouldn’t be because of me. I thought about his cologne and the warmth that he gave me whenever he would hold my hand or put his arms around me. That it would have been great if I could hold his hand one day and tell him one last time that I loved him, just one day.  However, that was the past and things always get better. Now that I’m back with him though it seems as if things have gotten even better. I guess it takes some time to be without someone to really know how much they’re worth🙊. I don’t want this to be a depressing post, but in the end relationships are always up and down and everything always gets better because that’s life. So carry on with your amazing lives and enjoy the rest of your day thanks:)